A Standard Worth Striving For

"Holy is the way God is. To be holy He does not conform to a standard. He is that standard." ~A.W. Tozer

In Psalm 51, David confesses his sin to God. He knew that he was so sinful and nothing in all of God's perfect holiness. As I read his confession, my own sin came to my mind. He was guilty of murder and adultery. I am guilty of comlacency. I love to worship God, through music especially. And Sunday has always been one of my favorite days as we come together to honor Him. But I am complacent in that every day I should be just as excited to get up and to honor Him. Every day at work, every mundaine task, every traffic jam, every load of laundry, every action and every word should be an opportunity for me to honor God for who He is and all He is worth. A wise worship leader once said that my best worship on Sunday isn't what's done up on stage, but what's done before service, before church, when no one else is around, in service to God through my life.

So where does that leave me? It reminds me of Isaiah, in the presence of God. I am a person of unclean lips. I am not worthy of being in His Presence, but His grace is so much greater... He seems so much more of all I can even begin to imagine when I compare His holiness to my humaness. So often I sing of what God has done for me, or what He means to me, but I am guilty of putting Him in my little box, and this is as much of Him as I need right now... But He's so much more than my little box can hold. One day all that any of us will be able to do is to praise Him for who He is in Himself. I don't want to wait until that day. I don't want complacency to hinder my offering of worship to Him. I want to become more like Him. I want to honor Him in everything I do, for all He's worth.

Set Me Free

Why am I here? Have you ever asked that question? I have a lot lately. Not necessarily to life itself, but at this stage in my life. After being out of college for 9 years, I find myself back where I started, and not knowing what's next. If it weren't for the times I have seen God work before, I would think for sure that there must be no way out; that this is all my life will be. And that's not enough. Don't get me wrong. I have been blessed with a wonderful family, a great church family, a nice home, a job that pays the bills, but there is something inside of me that is screaming to get out....knowing that there must be something more.... Each day seems to become more and more of a chore. The harder I try to change it, the harder it seems to get. Yet the voice inside me screams more. I am tired of fighting. The more I fight for that dream, that desire, I feel like the toddler first learning to walk. Just as I get close, it gets moved back more. And yet, when I try to quit, I can't. I yearn to be free, but it seems that there are invisible shackles holding me down. My heart cries out:

Set me free - from these chains that hold me down
Set me free - from these fears that have me bound
I am dying in this life that seems to hold me captive now
But I know there must be more; Set me free....

While everything around me seems to scream "Give it up, there's no way!" I can't keep going like things are. I just want to be free...